something to think about

thoughts of an addled mind.

I didn't even know you, but I already knew how I would react to your presence, making another my bane, and second half, Isnt that scary?

Becoming my strengths and weakness at once I always hated the idea of not being whole again, my thoughts and ideas and feelings depending on another something I hated so much, perhaps that hate reminds me of my younger years under the control of my parents

But at least, in love I would be bound to something, and mabye my thoughts would be addled no longer?

But at the sake of being selfish through the gratification it brings, Imagine I lose myself or the best version because the one I am with dosent compliment my soul, dosent have something for me or they to bounce off on, imagine my peak being unachievable because I chose wrongly?

The last thing I would want on someone I care so much about is to feel unloved, at times I wonder if my thoughts are justified when there are little examples of what I’d want

Mabye I would finally have someone to blame for my changing personality, mabye with this love I feel I would genuinely feel happy again, not just pretending for the sake of the fam and friends

so I think these are my fears, not a cry for help or a plea for love, just something to think about, just something that needs to be spat out.

perhaps a sub would make my mind less addled, so drop one now, would ya?